{"id":569,"date":"2024-11-13T12:06:31","date_gmt":"2024-11-13T12:06:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/?post_type=episode_posts&p=569"},"modified":"2024-11-17T14:19:37","modified_gmt":"2024-11-17T14:19:37","slug":"episode-5-getting-lost","status":"publish","type":"episode_posts","link":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/?episode_posts=episode-5-getting-lost","title":{"rendered":"Episode 5: Getting Lost"},"content":{"rendered":"

Getting Lost \u00a0<\/strong><\/h4>\n

There are four distinct routes across France leading towards St Jaques de Compostelle in Spain.\u00a0 I had selected via Podiensis<\/em>, which starts at Le Puy en Velais and ends at St Jean Pied du Port at the foot of the Pyrenees.\u00a0 This route was known as GR 65.<\/p>\n

There are very detailed guidebooks covering different sections of the GR 65.\u00a0 I walked through three, posting the completed books back to Switzerland.\u00a0 During six and a half weeks, the GR 65 took me through seven different departments across France.\u00a0 I sampled the differences in gastronomie, wines, agriculture, types of cattle as I moved through herds, as well as the diversity of landscapes and terrain.\u00a0 I recorded my journey with photos and short videos, using my cell phone placed in a pocket at my knee.<\/p>\n

2012 was the year I got my first cell phone, having resisted until then.<\/p>\n

Ronald and I had smiled at each other as cell phones went off in restaurants and people patted their pockets and reached for handbags.<\/p>\n

He never used a cell phone, to the consternation of his professional colleagues.\u00a0 He was coordinating the Geneva Declaration, a global initiative for the reduction of armed violence for development \u2013 without his own private computer or a cell phone.\u00a0 He\u2019d been issued one of course but, at the time of his death, this was found in a drawer in his office.\u00a0 Instead, he carried a flash drive and accessed computers in Swiss Embassies or UN offices \u2013 wherever he found himself.\u00a0 He was also never without a small notebook and pen which fitted in his shirt pocket.\u00a0 I\u2019d found a series of little notebooks with his illegible shorthand when clearing out his desk.<\/p>\n

Ronald had a superb memory, recalling facts and conversations with individuals from years back, often disconcerting for \u2018politicians\u2019 in the Balkans \u2013 prone to periodically reinventing the past in the present.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

I followed my guidebook, planning each day and deciding how far I could go, depending on the terrain, the forest cover (it was July and hot), and options for accommodation at the end.\u00a0 I would then phone ahead and book my space.<\/p>\n

During the first half of my journey when I was walking in sandals with blisters and bandages, I was fortunate to have the services of malle postale, <\/em>vehicles which collected pilgrims\u2019 rucksacks in the morning and drove them to their destinations for the night.\u00a0 I therefore only carried a daypack with my water and essentials.\u00a0 There were no such services for the final third of my journey, which is why and when I lightened my load and posted 9 kgs back to Switzerland.\u00a0 I simply kept a change of walking clothes, my sleep attire, casual harem pants and my kikoi, which I wore every night to dinner.\u00a0 This was either in the gite<\/em> or a restuarant in a village if I\u2019d opted for a more comfortable night with my own room in an auberge.<\/em><\/p>\n

The Via Podeniensis<\/em> is well marked and GR 65 signs abound, visible at every twist and turn along the way.\u00a0 It\u2019s virtually impossible to lose your way, unless there\u2019s thick fog and no visibility.<\/p>\n

But I did.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d been walking for perhaps a week without coming into the vicinity of towns, industry or motorways.\u00a0 But suddenly, walking down a particularly rocky path, I began to feel uncomfortable as the unexpected sound of traffic and low level hum of industry and\u00a0 urban life entered my field.<\/p>\n

Quite distraught, I saw a railway bridge passing high overhead and small factories nestled at the base of tall aqueduct-type archways supporting it.\u00a0 There was nothing resembling this urban mass reflected in my guidebook.\u00a0 I would have to continue down into the hub and ask.<\/p>\n

It was stressful, venturing out from the undergrowth onto the road.\u00a0 The \u2018path\u2019 had ceased being a path as such and I was having to clamber over rocks and through bushes.\u00a0 The road had traffic moving in both directions quite fast, it seemed to me.\u00a0 I needed to pause and adjust to this before trying to cross to the row of small shop fronts I could see.<\/p>\n

Walking slowly along the \u2018shops\u2019 \u2026 I heard birds\u2026and it was the birdsong which drew me into one interior.\u00a0 A pet shop.
\nInside, a friendly woman looked at my guidebook and shook her head as we turned it around this way and that, trying to orientate ourselves.<\/p>\n

\u2018You are lost\u2026very lost\u2019
\nSo lost, in fact, that she couldn\u2019t direct me back to where I\u2019d deviated from my path.
\nShe put me in her car and drove me back up the winding mountain road to the place where the GR 65 passed.\u00a0 I got out, thanking this angel profusely.
\nThen I saw it.<\/p>\n

The signs indicated with two huge Xs on either side that the path stopped there.\u00a0 NO ENTRY.\u00a0 Another huge arrow showed a right turn into a short tunnel under the railway line to continue to the other side.
\nHow had I missed this obvious change in direction?\u00a0 These clear signs?<\/p>\n

What had I been doing? thinking? focusing on?<\/p>\n

Yes.\u00a0 It dawned.\u00a0 I had allowed myself to dwell on some recent events preceding my setting off on the Camino, not pleasant thoughts.\u00a0 In fact, I\u2019d started feeling emotions of anger and resentment as I relived Ronald\u2019s death and the aftermath, directing the feelings at people and my disappointment at the turn of events.\u00a0 Reliving a sense of betrayal.<\/p>\n

Standing now in front of the signs and reflecting on my earlier mood and the powerful emotions which had spun me off my path, I had the \u2018aha\u2019 moment!<\/p>\n

Ronald\u2019s mantra from James Thurber came through loud and clear:<\/p>\n

Look back, not in anger
\n<\/em>Nor forward in fear
\n<\/em>But around, in awareness<\/em><\/p>\n

A very clear lesson indeed!
\nI had allowed anger to take me out of the present and had ceased to look around in awareness.
\nAnd look where I landed up.
\nThat was the only time it happened!<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Learning the lesson “Look back not in anger, nor forward in fear. But around in awareness” (James Thurber) Ronald’s mantra.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":570,"template":"","categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-569","episode_posts","type-episode_posts","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-part-4-aftermath-and-afterlife"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/episode_posts\/569","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/episode_posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/episode_posts"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/570"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=569"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=569"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mylisteningheart.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=569"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}